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Canada Fears Flood of American Liberals if Obama Loses

Written by Gary North on November 6, 2012

This was sent to me. It may be bogus, but we live in strange times.

The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada Has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration.

Canadian border farmers say its not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night.

“I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn,” said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. “The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn’t have any, he left. Didn’t even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?”

In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields.

“Not real effective,” he said. The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn’t give milk.”

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals Near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the border and leave them to fend for themselves.

“A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions,” an Ontario border patrolman said. “I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though.”

When liberals are caught, they’re sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives.

In the days before the election, liberals have turned to sometimes ingenious ways of crossing the border.

Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers.

“If they can’t identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age,” an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are Creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies.

“I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can’t support them,” an Ottawa resident said. “How many art-history majors does one country need?”

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15 thoughts on “Canada Fears Flood of American Liberals if Obama Loses

  1. Please let the liberals leave. No, wait…..
    Make them leave. They’ll be safe in Canada. Canada’s been living under the aegis of the United States since their inception and will continue to do so. Their only problem will be the high percentage of liberals that ate on the dole.

  2. I would have to agree, maybe after Ovomit looses he will do us a favor and go with them. That would be a bonus for America, take this Kenyon trash with you.

  3. Gloria Wedemeyer says:

    There is nothing that would make me happier than all the liberals to go to Canada.

  4. This article is great…….and hilarious! And Gary is absolutely correct about libs always wanting to leave is this or that conservative or Republican gets elected.
    Well, maybe this time we can actually make them put their money where their mouths are! And you know, I wouldn't miss a one of them! And certainly not the hollyweird types!

  5. The libtards should all go to Mexico since they love the illegal invasion so much.

  6. Were do conservitives go if, God forbid BigBummer gets in for 4 more years?

  7. Dr. Duncan Druhl says:

    No, hold on! WE DON’T WANT THEM UP HERE. Send them to Mexico, the weather is much nicer there. We are just beginning to get this place straightened out after years of so-called liberal federal government. Harper is doing very well and the last thing we need is more sociology professors. They’re a glut stocking shelves in Wal-Mart as it is. A few have taken the vagrant route, offering social networking theory tips in exchange for food or a nice Merlot. However, given the absence of leadership of the liberal party in Ontario right now, there is an opening….

  8. Canada could give them jobs monitoring the polar bear population. I understand that their popul;ation of bears has grown recently and the liberals could help in many ways. It would work out well for the liberals too as it would be an environmentally clean job.

  9. Bill Smith says:

    Red Greenfield = Red Green. Get it? Keep your stick on the ice. I’m pulling for you. We’re all in this together.

  10. Get 'em all out, now!

  11. Let them go to Canada…after all, that's where one of their leaders went…..our ex… "Sex addict-in-Chief " . He was able to come back and lead our US of A. Isn't this what America is all about? Is this a great country or what?

  12. I'LL PERSONALLY VOLUNTEER TO HELP 'EM PACK & DRIVE 'EM STRAIGHT TO THE BORDER. FOR A NOMINAL FEE, OF COURSE. AFTER ALL, I AM A "CAPITALIST PIG". BUT THIS FITS IN WITH MY DEFINITION OF COMMUN ITY SERVICE. I'LL KINDA FEEL BAD FOR CANADA, THOUGH. I MEAN, THEY'VE NEVER DONE ANYTHING BAD TO US & THEIR TROOPS HAVE BRAVELY FOUGHT ALONGSIDE OURS IN IRAQ & AFGANISTAN. THEY'VE EVEN OFFERED TO SELL US OIL CHEAPER THAN THE TOWELHEADS WILL & EVEN INVEST MONEY N THE KEYSTONE PIPELINE. THEY DON'T COME HERE & STEAL OUR JOBS AT SLAVE WAGES, OR CAUSE PROBLEMS IN OUR NEIGHBORHOODS, OR OVERBURDEN OUR WELFARE SYSTEM & HOSPITALS WITH ILLEGAL ALIEN BABIES EITHER. NICE FOLKS, CANADIANS ARE. GOOD NEIGHBORS, ALL IN ALL. JUST TELL 'EM TO PLAY ON THE LIBERAL ENVIRONMENTAL ADGENDA & SEND 'EM UP TO MONITOR THE ARCTIC CIRCLE FOR SIGNS OF GLOBAL WARMING. MAKE BERMUDA SHORTS & TANK TOPS THEIR OFFICIAL UNIFORMS THAT MUST BE WORN AT ALL TIMES & VIOLA, PROBLEM SOLVED !!!!!!!!!!!!

  13. NOWHERE…..WE STAND OUR GROUND & FIGHT !!!!!!!!!

  14. OregonMuse says:

    What do you mean, "it may be bogus"?? It's an obvious spoof, like you would read in in The Onion. Dr. North can be so blind sometimes…

  15. Chuckles the clown says:

    ^Immune to dry humor. See the observation, "I had not thought of this before" also posted today http://teapartyeconomist.com/2012/11/06/video-chr